Owning My Addiction to Food

I think all of the Halloween candy is nearly gone. I must admit I did help put a dent in the supply myself. Stupid snack sized snickers. I have been really good at justifying eating crap from time to time. I've noticed that my inner self will convince myself that it's "OK" to eat a little more or eat something bad because "I'll work it off later". Lies! Lies, I tell you. 

This weekend I ate a handful of fries, a McDonald's cheeseburger, candied yams, ham, I think I had an ice cream Friday, 2 bags of Sweet & Spicy Dorritos, and 1.5 BBQ pork chops, mashed potatoes, and probably some candy. 

Dang it!! 

I understand that the exercise is to burn the fat already stored on my body NOT the snickers bars or french fries or other pointless carb or greasy food I put into my mouth!It seems so simple.  It's that inner struggle, boredom, weakness, taste buds tingling, stomach yearning, and mind talk that gets to you. If this isn't a food addiction I don't know what is. 

I am going to treat it like an addiction and take it one day at a time, hour by hour, minute by minute. 

"Hi, my name is Karla and I'm powerless over my addiction to food."

I've been looking into Overeaters Anonymous (OA) meetings. I'm trying to muster up the courage to go to one of the meetings or at least attend a phone or chat meeting. I have step one down (admitting you are powerless over your problem) now I need to learn what steps 2-12 are and how to follow through on it. 

To look on the bright side, I am eating more veggies, taking in more protein, going to the gym 2-3 times per week. Also last night when I was hungry I made a strawberry/banana/chocolate protein smoothie and ate sliced apple with peanut butter for a snack. That was a good alternative to the burger, hot dog, chips, or cookies the "old me" would have gone for. It's the goodies that get in the way. As we speak I have 2 coupons for a dozen krisy kreme doughnuts,and about 20 coupons for a free Wendy's Frosty  in my purse. As I type this I swear a little drool was produced just thinking about the HOT KK doughnuts. 

NO! I can do this. Food is meant for fuel not pleasure.  

Ok I just had to rant about how my body and my brain are betraying me. I will fight this good fight everyday and make better choices. Maybe I will break out my notes from last semester's substance abuse class and do a relapse prevention plan. Hey, whatever works right? 

I can do this!!